UT-Martin’s Skyhawk Stops in Oxford to Visit the Landshark

Oct 18, 2014; Oxford, MS, USA; Mississippi Rebels fans during the game against the Tennessee Volunteers at Vaught-Hemingway Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Spruce Derden-USA TODAY Sports

On Friday morning UT-Martin mascot, Captain Skyhawk, stopped in Oxford, Mississippi on his way to Starkville for their upcoming football game against Mississippi State. The purpose of the visit was to sit down with the Ole Miss landshark.

Of course, there is no landshark mascot because no one is quite sure what a landshark would look like, if it actually existed. The only evidence we have found is here:

Such was the purpose of the meeting between Captain Skyhawk and Ole Miss defensive coordinator Dave Wommack. The fundamental fabric of animal mascots and nicknames are being tossed aside for made-up ones.

The Skyhawk is clearly stated: a hawk flies around in the sky.

The landshark is confusing: sharks swim in water, and die on land.

It’s a battle Captain Skyhawk has been fighting for years with his NFL cousin, the Seahawk. Hawks don’t live in the sea, so he has been advocating a clear distinction by changing their franchise name to the Seattle Ospreys.

Here’s what Captain Skyhawk had to say about his meeting with Ole Miss personnel:

"I just wanted to meet with the Ole Miss defensive coordinator, but when I arrived there was also a Geology professor in his office. They had a comeback for all of my suggestions.When I said sharks don’t live on land, they claimed it was historical due to the theory that the shores of the Gulf were where Oxford currently is six million years ago. The Geology professor claimed to have found three shark’s teeth within 20 feet of the Tad Pad. Also Landshark is a beer, Ole Miss fans like to drink beer, and partying in the most important tradition at the University of Mississippi.When I suggested they get rid of the landshark name all together for the purpose of properly educating children, they started getting testy by claiming football was more important than education. To be clear I used Coach’s Wommack’s white erase board to draw “partying > football > education” and they both agreed that was correct.When I made the proposal that Bears where just as frightening as sharks, they shushed me, looked around and closed the door saying they are not the Bears and anyone inferring such could be subject to being kicked in the head by a Nkemdiche.Finally, they told me they were Rebels and Rebels didn’t listen to authority or care about proper animal nicknames. So I left for Starkville a little disheartened but glad to play a team with one mascot and nickname – a real animal with no confusion. Perhaps one day all athletic teams will adhere to proper nicknames, but I may just be a dreamer."